Salad Bar

I am truly blessed to have met hundreds of mothers in the last few years through a playgroup that I started July 4, 2006. How did you, a girl with social anxiety do that you ask? Well that is a story for another time,... today I want to talk about a friendship made,...

Darla and I met through the "No Drama Mamas" when our little ones weren't even 2 years old.  We were an unlikely pair.  One athletic mom the other needing to spend less time eating and more at the gym. One pale skinned Irish looking girl the other golden brown. Our friendship grew out of our love for our children.  I have a girl, she has a boy,... we must have looked like Mutt and Jeff, but for us it worked.  Alike in values but so different in our backgrounds.

The kids quickly entered school and Darla moved, not far, but far enough for us to stop seeing each other regularly. While I would see her every couple of months it just wasn't the same,... until last night.

Last night we ran into one another.  She looked awesome, as fit and healthy as always.  Her son in 1st grade, daughter now in middle school, she finished school and her family was finally doing well after medical scares and deployment woes.  She is looking forward to moving overseas at the end of the month. I had heard through the grapevine that she was moving again,... but seeing her in person made me ache.

We talked with the rest of the group for several hours but when it came time to leave I just didn't want to walk away. We stood outside the cafe, street lights buzzing above us, the cold nipping at our fingers and toes, neither wanting to walk away.

I think god knew I needed her that night.  I had been struggling with feelings of insecurity, inadequacy and was down on myself. With her loving words she lifted me us as she shared with me the story of the Salad Bar Friends.

As a child you may not even like a salad but at least there are a few things on it that you will eat.  I know that I didn't like anything,... I was a lettuce only type of kid.  Give me some lettuce with carrot and thousand island dressing and that was all I would eat.

I've grown up.  When I go to a salad bar I now get my beloved lettuce but add color to it.  I like carrots, cucumbers, celery, mushrooms, radishes, peas and broccoli.  There was a time I liked sunflower seeds in my salad but not any more.  I have tried red peppers, yellow peppers, green peppers, apples, oranges and even onions but either I don't like them or I just don't like them in my salad.  Sometimes I make a taco salad. I add taco meat, tortilla chips and cheese.  Sometimes I am in the mood for chicken, shrimp, ham or bacon bits.

Friendships are like salad bars. What we like or want changes over time.  Friends that you had can be like the carrots that I have always liked and wanted in my salad. A friend can be like the sun flower seeds that I liked so much for awhile but I out grew the taste of.  They can even be like the onions that I don't like the taste of any more. Or they can be like the apples that while I like to eat them occasionally I don't like them in my salad.

Some friends are like the new things we try to add to our salad but they just don't taste right. Others are beloved and will always fit in.

Darla reminded me that I do love with all my heart and I do give to everyone around me.  Some people are in my life for a small amount of times, others for longer. Either way I had an impact on them and at some point they fit into my salad fine, as I learn and grow they might find their way back in or not, either way its OK.